I am not an adventurous person. I was never one for all night parties, sex without regret, and experimentation of anything illegal, mind-altering, or past it’s expiration date. All my life, I thought it was shameful to be so tame, but I’ve finally learned to embrace it. It’s who I am. So here I am. Liz Black, born to be mild.
Wait. Does everyone else know that there’s currently an Enrique Iglesias song on the iTunes Top 100 (currently standing at #78) called “Tonight (I’m F—ing You)”??? I. Am. Scandalized. For all I know, this song is months old and it was an internet meme that I missed, but I’m only just learning about it now. Is it about Anna Kournikova? Does dad Julio approve of such language? Does anyone else feel dirty?
Ironically, I LOVE the Cee-Lo song “Fuck You,” so I guess I have no problem when the F-word is directed at someone in anger, but when it’s actually used to describe intercourse, I recoil. My ears are like the MPAA — they have no problem with depictions of strong violence, but God forbid they’re exposed to brief sensuality. In other news, my unborn children are already embarrassed by me.